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Would you ever talk to your child or grandchild the way you talk to yourself? Would you say “you’re so gross!” “you’re fat!” “you’re hideous!”?

Of course, you wouldn’t. And, yet, we talk to ourselves that way when we look at our bodies in the mirror. We allow the hateful voices to play over and over in our minds until we believe them.

A few years ago, I was teaching at a ministry conference about trends in children’s ministry. I’d worked hard to develop the content. I was ready, but I wasn’t sure I could make it to the session I was to teach. As I got dressed that morning in my hotel room, I was bombarded with thoughts: “I’m hideous!” “I’m huge!” “Why would anyone listen to me?” “I can’t go teach that class!” I even felt five times bigger than I actually was!

It was spiritual warfare! And it took everything to leave that hotel room. On the elevator, I joined someone from our company’s business department. “How are you?” he asked innocently. “I am being so attacked right now by the enemy!” I responded. Awkward! What do you say to that?

I made it into that room where hundreds waited and by God’s grace, we had a great session together. But it was a battle to make it there! I was almost robbed of a great ministry experience and being used by God.

Think of all the things awful self-talk steals from us–getting together with old friends (oh, I haven’t lost the weight), attending parties (I’m too fat and ugly), going to the beach/lake/pool with kids (ahem…swimsuits). Maybe these thoughts even keep us from meeting the right one. Or even worse–being the right one that God can use.

I’m convinced that this journey we’re on is about more than food cravings and appetite. It’s a spiritual battle. “For our struggle is against the spiritual forces of wickedness” (Ephesians 6:12).

Sometimes I wonder if the enemy is so aware of the great potential of an army of women who are in tune with the voice of God–instead of cravings; who walk in the Spirit instead of the flesh; who live free from the bondage of the world’s system of diets. I wonder if the enemy is so aware that he works triple time to take us out with bondage to food and diets–and his #1 tool is self-hate.

Those hateful words we say to ourselves are straight from the pit of hell. And when we listen to them, we start believing them. And when we believe them, we become them. And when we become them, we are benched. We’re taken out!

Jesus said in John 10:10: “The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy. I have come that they may have life–and have it abundantly!”

Whatever your self-talk is…if it’s not something you’d say to your own child or grandchild, shut it down! I can guarantee you that these messages aren’t from a loving Father. And if they’re not from Him, then they are from the enemy who despises us and wants to disable us from powerful service to God.

“Take every thought captive to make it obedient to Christ” (2 Corinthians 10:5).

How do we do this? In the power of the Holy Spirit. Ask God to help you stop the hateful self-talk. Ask God to help you discern His loving voice and to shut down the enemy’s destructive voice.

Focus on what’s good. Fill your mind with kindness toward yourself.

“Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.” (Philippians 4:8)

Here’s an example. I have an issue with my arms–no one’s going to see these arms! I think they’re flabby and ugly and old and…you get the message. So, instead of thinking those things…why not think about how strong they are…how gentle they are with my precious grandson…how much they love to hug and pat the ones I love…how skilled they are at typing…the amazing things they can knit, cook, write, design… (you get the picture).

My prayer for you, dear friend, is that you shut down the awful messages that have made you feel ugly…that have sidelined you from kingdom work…that have robbed you of the abundant life Jesus gives us. Here’s to the power of the positive in our lives! Thank you, God!